Now that I’ve been married for one month (yes…a lot has happened since my text break-up days) I’m ready to shop at grown-up stores like Pottery Barn. I’ve been jonesing for the White Bedford Corner Desk in white antique finish—it is my dream desk. But I don’t want to pay the top dollar PB wants… so naturally I’ve been stalking Craigslist to find a White one.
Ring, ring.
“Hey honey,” answered Hunky Husband.
“Guess what?!” I squealed. “I found the dream desk on Craigslist!”
“Oh yeah?” said HH. “What’s the story?”
“Corner desk with matching chair,” I started.
“So far so good….,” said HH.
“Two-drawer -file cabinets and desk protector,” I read. “For $600..”
“Awesome…” said HH.
“The only downside is that its espresso stained,” I added. “But I can get over that, it comes with the chair and protector – which is usually $1,200.”
“Hmm,” said HH suddenly distracted. “Oh shit! I’m late for a meeting. Talk to you tonight—love you.”
**5 hours later **
“So, I emailed the Craigslist guy,” I said. “And he dropped the price to $550,” I said.
“Yeah,” huffed HH. “I’m sure he did”.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“Is that guy high or something?!” said HH.
“He didn’t mention it,” I said. “Why?”
“I mean the guy thinks he can sell a desk with freakin’ coffee stains all over it,” said HH. “I mean –“
“Hey hun-“ I interjected.
“..What kind of douche bag puts his espresso cup on a white desk everyday and just lets it stain?” said HH. “And then tries to sell it for $600?!”
“Well—“ I said.
“What an idiot! Why didn’t he put a coaster down?” he ranted. “Geez..didn’t he notice little coffee rings all over the place?”
“Babe—“ I said.
“There’s no way in hell we’re buying it,” HH said shaking his head. “Yeah?”
“The desk isn’t white,” I explained. “Espresso stain is the color of the wood.”
“Oh,” said HH.
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ba da boom. now that's classic! well written, even I was hoodwinked!
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